Cawfee Tawk

Oh, man do I love my ice vanilla soy lattes from that local cafe and bakery that charges way too much for my morning joe. In fact, I have to pay about $5.55 for a medium one of those every morning. Granted after 10 I get a free one with my punch card but dammit! That’s not going to cut it this month.

As I mentioned, I’m in a financial pickle because my boyfriend just had to be born at the end of August, leaving me strapped for cash after the glorious mini-vacay I got him because I’m the best girlfriend on the planet.

Ground rule of budgetology numero uno (that means number one in Spanish, you know I don’t speak Spanish): When strapped for cash, the morning coffee must be the first thing to go. I know, I know, it makes you want to cry. What did the morning coffee ever do to you besides make you energized and excited to start the day?

Well, it was an unnecessary expenditure that must be destroyed, that’s what it did, foo! I know you don’t like it but you basically have three options here:

  1. You could use that coffee machine in your kitchen that’s been gathering rust and dust and must for the last year. Buying that powder grind from the store will save you nearly $5 a day which is $35 a week which is (hold on, let me get out my phone calculator) $175 a month. That’s a gas bill and a wifi bill!
  2. You could go to trader joes. Purchase the following items: Cold Brew Coffee Concentrate ($7.99) and your choosing of half and half, 2%, or whatever the fuck you put in there. OR, even better, go to a breakfast place, tell them you just bought coffee and hour ago and you need more half and half creamers. Free cream. You can also go to a local car dealership and get powered creamer there for free. If you put sugar in your coffee…don’t be stupid! Go to your local restaurant, tell them you just bought an iced tea an hour ago and you need more sugar packets and use those. 50759-cold-brew-coffee
  3. This third option is what I’ve been doing for the last week and it works great. Why? Because I can get my coffee for $1.99 and I can also get a free lunch at the same time. How, you may ask? Well…read on in the next post to learn more. That’s all for now.

♥ The Budgetologist 

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What’s For Dinner?

I’m struggling this month, I’m really struggling this month. My boyfriend had a birthday and it wiped me out financially. Damn him for being born!

I figure after rent, utilities, gas, wifi and my hefty credit card bill I’ll barely have any money for food every day. It’s going to be pushing it to be able to spend $5 a day. I’m aiming more for about $3 a day.

Now let’s just put this out there now, I can’t cook for shit. I screwed up nachos last night. But it’s for good reason, dammit. I never wanted to be a housewife (a fate worse than death in my young mind. Why? Well, no financial independence of course! Stuck under the financial fate of a husband who might have an Ashley Madison account as we speak, no thank you.) so it was intentional that I never learned to cook! Yeah, kicking myself over that one.

Luckily, there’s some life hacks I use to stay under budget and not cook. First of all, I live on baked potatoes. I love those things. They’re about 80 cents a potato. Throw them in the microwave (but for christ sakes, poke holes in them first, common now). I’ll be eating one for dinner for sure. They fill you up with all that starch. Gotta love them.

I get butter packets from local restaurants that serve breakfast so I don’t have to pay for butter myself. Just go in, say you were a customer earlier and you’d like some extra butter packets. It’ll work every time, guaranteed.

Then I spend about $1.68 on sour cream and just go. to. town. Hey, It’s not a lot of calories and it’s freakin delicious. Why not save money and lose weight at the same time?

♥ The Budgetologist 

Saving money could save your life

Why is it important to save? Because life is a big old machine of who-knows-what tossing unexpected bullshit your way at any given second. No money in the bank is probably the worst fate there is.

Here’s an example: Suppose you’re walking along and bam! you get cancer. A physically fit 30-something year old like yourself should be healthy with no problems right? Wrong! It happens all the time.

Never fear though, you have health insurance! Through your job! And that will pay for all of your treatments right? Wrong! In reality, do you think if something serious happens to your health, your insurance will pay for even a fraction of what it will cost you? Do you think you’ll be able to go to work every day and do what you need to do to earn the money you need to survive? Hell no, you won’t. This is when savings becomes a matter of life and death.

Did I scare you? Good! You needed a J.K. Simmons in Whiplash moment to snap into reality. Realize this: saving money is crucial and therefore budgeting is crucial. You’re not going to work forever, you’re not going to be able to work forever, and you most certainly will not want to work forever. You’ve got to have money in the bank before you bank your butt (what?!)

Here’s the deal: I have budgeting down to a science. I think about my finances and budgeting more times in the day than I care to admit. This year, I’ve been living on wages that are barely above minimum for the state of California. Why? Because I’m in my dream job and everyone’s gotta start somewhere. It’s taught me more about budgeting than I thought I knew. I want to share some of my secrets with you.

♥ The Budgetologist